In recent posts, we have examined current research from the Pew Center around “Why Americans Go (and Don’t Go) to Religious Services,” providing candid commentary describing the state of affairs that exist in many American churches.  In response to a popular survey reply, “I practice my faith in other ways,” I believe another significant reason why people stay away from church lies in the way professing believers have DIS-connected themselves from the world and have chosen to “silo” themselves from the unchurched and the lost.

Numerous studies have shown that the longer people are believers, the fewer contacts, friendships, and connections are maintained with the lost and unchurched world.  Some of this is due to the changing spiritual affections and desires within a believer.  He/she simply doesn’t want to live the way he/she lived before.  Some of this shift is also due to the time demands church often places upon people.  In any given week, people can be expected to spend 5-10 hours at church or with church people for worship services, Bible classes, small groups, and/or volunteer opportunities.  By the time all these things are checked off the weekly schedule, many people don’t have any more available time, especially when work and family demands are pressing.

Add to this dilemma is the apparent and noticeable uncomfortableness that maturing believers have in relating to the lost and the unchurched.  I cannot tell you how many parishioners have quietly shared with me that all their friends, most of their neighbors, and family members are all Christians; therefore, they see no need to “get out of their bubble” and befriend an unchurched or spiritually-lost person.

This “silo” attitude is not the gospel, nor does it possess the heart of Jesus Christ for a lost world.

Part of the reason why some believers have isolated themselves from the rest of the world comes from their misconceived perception of what an unchurched or a lost person is really like.  True, there are some REALLY bad people out there, but not every unchurched or lost person is an addict, criminal, or an immoral scum-bag.  Truth be told, in many of your neighborhoods right now, there are some good people who—like you—want a good marriage, a happy family, meaningful work, and a fulfilling life.  All they need is a simple befriending around a common interest, hobby, or passion that both of you share.

Think for a moment about the things you enjoy doing individually or as a family.  When my three children were growing up, all of them wanted to play baseball and softball.  So, yours truly became an assistant coach on each of their teams, choosing not to drop them off at the ball park for practices and for games, but to be there with them, and to get to know other people and families in the community who wanted their children to play ball.  That common interest (in this case, sports) served as a bridge to connect me with other people in your community, and it gave me the opportunity to establish relationships so that the gospel could gain a foot hole in their lives.

More than ten years ago, on a Memorial Day Sunday, I set up a display in the church I was then serving to honor my father’s and father-in-law’s service during WWII, and other church members participated with their family members’ photos and descriptions also.  Several men in the congregation who were members of the veterans’ color guard (the riflemen who do the 21-gun salutes), quickly connected me with the chaplain of their color guard who—from that point on—frequently invited me to officiate with the color guard at veteran funerals for grieving families who didn’t have a pastor.  Now, years later, I have had the humble, yet joyful privilege of officiating at over ONE HUNDRED funerals for veterans’ families (many of whom were unchurched and spiritually lost), and some of these unreached families have found their way into the congregations where I have served.  All of this came about from a common passion (to honor veterans) and a desire to connect with people in that specific “sphere” of life.

This week, look around your community and see some ways you can naturally “bridge” into the lives of other people simply through common interests, passions and hobbies.  Rearrange your “church schedule” to accommodate this, if you must, for salt and light were meant to be spread, not hidden or siloed from the rest of the world.